Spirituality - posted on December 27, 2016 by

Merry Fuckin’ Christmas, Bitches!

 

 

INTRO:

Welcome Rebels to the – Merry Fuckin’ Christmas, Bitches! – Edition of Rated ARM Rebellion Episode 1776-029! Available right now at RatedARM.com & Soundcloud.com/RatedARM and on iTunes under Rated ARM Rebellion.

I’m your host John D. – The ARMed Comic & America’s answer to Whoopi Goldberg, The Dixie Chicks & Saul Alinsky – Fuck Them All! – the realist fuckin’ American Real Man you’re ever gonna find.  But just remember, I’m a fucking comedian, not your Goddamn therapist, so if you don’t like what you hear, fuck off, I don’t give a shit.  Don’t fucking listen & go get a Goddamn sense of humor, Pussy!

My well-armed in studio militia, or as I like to call them, welcome the Sons of Liberty, ladies and gentleman.  Gun check!  Everyone strapped tonight?

BUFORD T. PUSSER – Prison / Prisoners Expert

CARL Deez Nutz PUSSER – Blue Collar Expert

John D. – Real Man Expert

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The Rated ARM Studios are located at 520 Chestnut St, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania 19103.  You can send us a letter, stop by, or call or email at 267-603-5646 / EmailARealMan@Gmail.com.  If and only if your shit is funny to A Real Man, regardless of what the fuck you have to say, we will play or read it on the show, especially if it’s about us.

WARNING TO GUESTS AND LISTENERS!  ALL OF THE INFORMATION GIVEN ON THIS SHOW MAY BE INACCURATE DUE TO THE ALMOST IMPOSSIBLE INABILITY TO FIND FACTS ON ANY SUBJECT IN AMERICA TODAY.  IF YOU HAVE ANY FUCKING FEELINGS AT ALL, DON’T BRING THEM TO THE RATED ARM REBELLION!  WE ONLY WANT LAUGHS, NO GOD DAMN FEELINGS!  AMERICA’S BEEN OPERATING ON FEELINGS SINCE THE LATE 80’S AND YOU CAN CLEARLY SEE WHERE THE FUCK THAT’S GETTING US.  FucksVille USA!

Now, pour yourself A Real Man drink (BOURBON, SCOTCH, BEER), what have you, as we pour ourselves one or all 3, and listen to the official intro music for the show, the 1st hit single from my band, John D. & The Rated ARM Banned, or you just fast forward past the shit if you’ve already heard it a billion times, but if you really and truly want to understand exactly what Rated ARM is all about, this song alone does a perfect job of explaining it.

Lock and Load Motherfuckers, Here’s W.A.R.!

We need reviews of the Rated ARM Rebellion on SoundCloud and iTunes.

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As I always say, my son, God rest his brain still has to live in this shithole for the rest of his life, so anything I can do to lighten his load, his children’s load, their children’s load etc…  That’s what I’m here for.

 

TODAY’S THEME or THE BALL TICKLER as it were – Merry Fuckin’ Christmas Bitches! – Edition of Rated ARM Rebellion Episode 1776-029!

 

LAST SHOW REVIEW – Can you fucking remember anything about Turn, Turn, Turn! – The Season Of Bullshittery Is About To Be Cancelled MotherFuckers!

Other than fatboy lovingly serenading us.

 

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Rated ARM Rebellion GOALS:

FUCKING DESTROY HOLLYWOOD, THE MAINSTREAM MEDIA & THE MAN HATING GOVERNMENT.  MAKE IT OK TO BE A REAL MAN IN AMERICA AGAIN FOREVER!

#1  Use the 1st Amendment in the form of NOTHING BUT FUNNY JOKES to absolutely obliterate Political Correctness, the #2 Cancer destroying everything America.  The #1 thing is Women and Men that act like Women, but the 1stAmendment a.k.a. the right and ability to say Go Fuck Yourself is the first weapon of that war.

#2  Use the 2nd Amendment in the form of NOTHING BUT PRO GUN JOKES & OPEN / CONCEALED CARRY EDUCATION to re-iterate to our audience that at least 33% of Americans are gun owners and while only .65% are military and .6 are law enforcement which means we out gun and outnumber them to a ridiculous level, not to mention, most of them would never, ever take up arms against Americans anyway.  Every American should own at least 3 guns or what I like to call, the starter kit.

#3  Use 1 & 2 everyfuckingthingelse we can think of to Guarantee the Constitution remains in tact at all fucking times.

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WHAT I DID FOR GOD THIS WEEK!
Prayed like a motherfucker for the ASSistant’s health – She came back HIV / Negative

 

WHAT I DID FOR FAMILY THIS WEEK!
Picked up son for breakfast the people to talk to him out of going into the military were there and then I explained to him that since I didn’t get the luxury of seeing him for his birthday I didn’t take him to do anything for his birthday and I didn’t buy him anything for his birthday maybe he’ll think about someone else next time but probably not

 

WHAT I DID FOR COUNTRY THIS WEEK!
Watched AR cleaning videos

Became an Ambassador to my favorite wounded vet charity

Cleaned my AR 1st time

WHAT I DID FOR MYSELF THIS WEEK!

Walks, good food, tea, vinegar & most importantly & most importantly solitude

WHAT DID YOU BUILD / CREATE / WORK ON THIS WEEK
My business like a bitch as in networking – went to another one right before the show

SHIT I ORDERED THIS WEEK!
My voodoo tactical rifle bag finally came in a box 3 times its size, signed for and left somewhere else, no one told me shit

Black condor hat delivered, then redelivered

Zippo fluid canister design flaw

Bic Mini 5 Pack Assorted Colors Lighter

Dry Packs Silica Gel Desiccant, 40gm

Sawyer Products SP105 Mini Water Filtration System, Single, Black

5.11 #74369 Men’s Stryke EDC Pants w/ Flex-Tac, TDU Green, 30-30

 

IN MY CART RIGHT NOW!
Another fucking job

RSO Training

YOT 94-2486 – Ford Bronco Tailgate Window Regulator

Barrel Scraping Tool for Gun Cleaning and Maintenance

Ballistol Multi-Purpose Oil, Aerosol spray, 6 oz

Unigear Gun Bore Cleaner Snake for Rifle Pisto Shotgun (.22-.223 Cal & 5.56mm)

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BEST / WORST THINGS I PERSONALLY WITNESSED OR HAPPENED TO ME ALL WEEK!
Went back to listening to talk radio again, even got an app

Schuylkill Banks Boardwalk

Moldy tub soap stink wtf

Have the feeling everyone in my networking group hates me because of my political beliefs

It looks like they’re finally kicking me out my house

Shaved with a blade all week

Gave $825.00 back to a client who couldn’t give a fuck

Gave back another $172.00 to another client who couldn’t give a fuck either

My tub is fucking disgusting

Got a Wishing you a Very Merry Holiday email from a contact after sending our Merry Christmas and go fuck yourself newsletter

Finally got a fucking hold of the Range Instructor to get my range instructor training.

Went to a celebration of life / eat / drink

Went to a Ranch

Saw the real life version of the Griswold family Christmas tree.

This Unicorn Changed the Way I Poop.

Farrakhan to Obama: Let Trump Do Want He Wants, You Failed Inner City Blacks

How grocery stores trick you into thinking meat is fresh.

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LOOK AT ME’S?
I just saw a black midget smoking weed driving down the highway

2 grown men following each other on musical lit up bicycles on the Riverwalk, how fucking gay

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THIS WEEKS THEME – – Merry Fuckin’ Christmas Bitches! – Edition of Rated ARM Rebellion Episode 1776-029!

The WAR on CHRISTmas, the war on Christ, the war on our Christian Nation is a war on America, its heritage, its greatness, its beliefs, its moral compass, its compassion, its do for yourself spirit, its teach a man to fish instead of give him one, its live by the sword, die by the sword its every single fucking thing that made us the most revered place on earth and you fucksticks wanna change it.  Fuck off and die you dumbass cocksuckers.

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WHAT WOULD TRUMP SAY?
‘We’re going to start saying ‘Merry Christmas’ again’

 

THE PEOPLE I LOVE THE MOST TODAY / THIS WEEK

Baby J, Donald J. Trump 45th President of the United States of America

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Rated ARM isms: – Rated ARM Dictionary

SuperFag

Bullshittery

The Musher

#NiggerFromNowhere

#IfYouveBeenInPoliticsYouShouldntBeInPolitics

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TRENDING IN AMERICA – RETARDOSPHERE:

KELLYANNE IN…

China tycoon moves jobs to US, citing high taxes at home

OBAMA DUMPS REGISTRY FOR SOME IMMIGRANT MEN, MOSTLY MUSLIMS…

CRAZED HILLARY VOTER LASHES OUT AT IVANKA ON JETBLUE…

BLUNDERS LEFT BERLIN KILLER FREE TO ATTACK…

Employee Lawsuit Accuses Google of ‘Spying Program’

…PRES-ELECT TRUMP MAKING DEALS WHILE POTUS OBAMA MAKING PUTTS

REPORT: ISLAMIC STATE SHARES LIST OF 🇺🇸 CHURCHES TO TURN INTO ‘BLOODY HORROR MOVIE’

MILO MOST DISINVITED SPEAKER OF 2016

The Daily Show Suggests Christmas Gifts of Birth Control for Women

Trump Names China Critic UC Irvine Prof to Lead Trade Council

Donald Trump: I Was ‘100% Correct’ on Muslim Terrorism; Berlin Terror ’An Attack on Humanity’

YouTube Hoaxster Adam Saleh Claims Delta Flight Booted Him for ‘Speaking Arabic’

One Dead as Lorry Plows Through Berlin Christmas Market

Boeing CEO Meets with Donald Trump: Promises to Deliver a Cheaper Air Force One

Walmart Drops Black Lives Matter ‘Bulletproof’ Clothing

‘Hey, White Guys’: Woke MTV News Accidentally Offers Up ‘First Trump 2020 Ad’

Watch Fiona Apple Yell ‘Donald Trump, F–k You’ at Standing Rock Benefit

Trump: US must ‘greatly strengthen’ nuclear capability

TRUMP SAYS HE WILL ‘DRAIN THE SWAMP,’ GINGRICH IS LYING

MSNBC HOST: DEMOCRATS MUST MAINTAIN ‘SUSTAINED DERANGED DELEGITIMIZATION’ OF TRUMP

GENERATION SNOWFLAKE: PERCENTAGE OF YOUNG ADULTS LIVING WITH THEIR PARENTS HASN’T BEEN THIS HIGH SINCE 1940

French Mayor To Be Charged With Hate Crime For Decrying “Replacement” of White People

Metallica Frontman: I Escaped California Over ‘Elitist’ Progressives

MEDIA FAIL: ONLY 29% OF AMERICANS BELIEVE RUSSIANS IMPACTED ELECTION

HILLARY’S POPULAR VOTE WIN CAME ENTIRELY FROM CALIFORNIA

VIDEO: AS WORLD LEADERS CONDEMN BERLIN ATTACK, RUSSIAN AMBASSADOR ASSASSINATION, OBAMA GOLFS

Has the whole world been bought by saudi arabia?

Passenger thrown off flight after confronting Ivanka Trump

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WATCH:
Happy F@#king Holidays!

Give the gift of failure to someone you know this holiday season, and join us for the first ever FailArmy Holiday Special!

Merry Fucking Christmas – SouthPark

The Grinch

 

LISTEN:
Mr. Grinch

South Park – Mr Garrison – Merry Fucking Christmas – YouTube

Bob Rivers – 12 Pains Of Christmas (with lyrics)

READ:
Merry F*cking Christmas: The Perfect Adult Coloring Book Gift For Xmas Grinches

Merry Christmas, B*tch: Swear Word Coloring Book

Twelve Days of F*cking Christmas: A Vulgar Christmas Carol Swear Word Coloring Book for Adults to Laugh, Relieve Stress and be Merry this Holiday Season (Volume 1)

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BEST QUOTES OF THE WEEK:

A Real Man always says Merry Christmas, and doesn’t give 2 shits how you feel about it.

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MANLY QUESTION OF THE DAY:

If Christmas and Christ offend you so fucking much, why they fuck do you live in America dipshit?

AREAS OF LIFE:

Spirituality, Relationships, Emotions, Fun, Responsibility, Finances, Mission, Health, Legacy

TARGET AUDIENCE:

Bikers, Mechanics, Military, Tactical, Rockers, Nascar, Scouts, Law Enforcement, Brewers, Uniformed, Hot Bitches with a God Dammed sense of humor.

WHAT WE NEED:

While you’re there, we are always looking for wordpress experts, promoters, videographers, graphic designers, social media people, anyone and everyone to build our global audience.

WHO WE NEED TO MEET:

We’re also looking to meet Eminem, his agent Cara Lewis, Andrew Dice Clay, his agent Bruce Rubenstein, Steel Panther and their manager Neil Warnock as well as very brave very forward thinking sponsors that are sick and fucking tired of political correctness and how it’s fucking everything in America up.  If you know these people and you can help, be A Real Man and fucking do something about it.

OUTRO:

That’s it for the Rated ARM Rebellion, we sincerely hope you enjoyed it, if not, go fuck yourself.  If you did, spread the love, tell everyone, Check out RatedARM.com for more info, all our social media pages, give us a Guns Up & don’t forget to write call or email the show.  This is John D. & The Sons of Liberty signin’ off and asking that you Never Forget to Always Revere A Real Man!

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